You have the chance to make a movie with Tom Hardy, Michelle Williams, and Riz Ahmed, and this is what you come up with?!

Riz Ahmed somehow acquires some alien creatures and one of them somehow merges with Tom Hardy. And now he’s got crazy abilities and an even crazier appetite. It plays out like a supehero origin story, but Venom is no hero. You’d think this would be a great opportunity to subvert the genre, yeah? Yeah, you’d think. Instead of doing that, it just pulled all of the worst bits of superhero films.

I did really like the Venom character, and his relationship with Tom Hardy (whose character I also liked). Any moment that was just about them navigating their new relationship, I dug. The rest of the movie was lazy and boring and even stupid at times.

Lord knows I love my scifis and supers and various other extraordinary stories. I am used to suspending disbelief and just going with their made up science and accepting it as a necessary part of the story. Welp, I seem to have hit my limit for that. I just could not buy a single thing they were saying, and I was ready to throw things if they said “symbiote” (or some variation) one more time (potential drinking game maybe?)

The action sequences were dull, the baddie cliche, the love interest overdone. Again, so much potential with such a cool character and a great cast, but it was totally wasted. Yet again, Hollywood realizes that we’ll pay money to see crap, and yet again we fell for it. We deserve better. So does Venom.

Venom – \m/ \m/

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