Fifty Shades of Grey

“Curious? That’s got to be the most apt publicity tagline for a me for a movie ever. It’s not that I was curious about the content, per say. I was curious as to what the fuss was all about. Why are so many people so rabidly into this story? I had to know. No way on Earth would this ever be my kind of movie, but a phenomenon this big is hard for me to ignore. Plus, I had a coupon!

I don’t need to explain the very thin plot to you, do I? No? Okay, moving on. I’ll admit, there was a lot that fascinated and intrigued me about this film. It raised many questions about relationship roles as well as trust and expectations. A lot of it had me really thinking, in a way that stuck with me most of the rest of the day. Let me set things straight, I was pondering things, not fantasizing. Philosphically different. What part of their relationship was okay vs what should have been a red flag to send Anastasia running out the door. What would I be willing to put up with vs what’s going too far?

Because for such a highly coveted romance, they really don’t have a lot of substance there. Like any other movie relationship, the two inexplicably fall desperately in love immediately. They can’t even bear to go a couple hours from each other. Gag. And for someone who claimed to be so devoted to his girl, Mr Grey really does put a lot of unfair and arguably abusive and manipulative pressure on her. Those are the sorts of things I was thinking about.

As far as the kink, it’s my understanding that it’s not a very accurate representation of the culture. I’ve been told that it should be based on trust, and that the open honesty and communication necessary to make it work make for a very solid relationship. That was not here whatsoever. Would I ever wanna read the book? Umm, no. Besides the fact that it’s amateurishly written, I feel if I really wanted to know about such things, there’d be much better sources. Still though, I’d rather re-read LOTR.

I’m coming off pretty negative, there was some fun to it. Yes, Jamie Dornan was incredibly hot. And while Dakota Johnson is a little green as an actress, she did have a likability. It’s my understanding that the screenplay smartened things up a bit, although much came off as very dumb. Without having read it, though, I could always tell when a line of dialogue must have been taken verbatum from the source. It was usually the really silly sounding lines that were meant to be sexy, often delivered in a fairly deadpan manner. Inappropriate giggles broke out in the audience. It was a fun fantasy to escape to, as long as you didn’t pay too much attention to the details.

Would I see it again? Not any time soon. A couple days after I was at the movies with a friend. Our intended flick was cancelled due to a leaky roof in the auditorium. Her first suggestion “”Would you see Fifty Shades?”” “”Again?! No”” I resounded quite forcefully. We saw Imitation Game instead. Much better choice.

Fifty Shades of Grey – \m/ \m/ \m/”

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