A Good Day to Die Hard

“Finally, the marketing types in Hollywood get something right. This Single’s Awareness/Hallmark/Valentine’s Day there were two movies that opened wide. A new Nicholas Sparks (gag) and a new Die Hard. Something for everyone yay! Doesn’t take much to figure out which one I went to.

I abosolutely \m/ love Die Hard. The original is on my favorites list, and something I absolutely MUST watch every Christmas. I certainly see it as a gold standard for the action genre. It’s one of maybe 5 movies that I own on BluRay, DVD, and VHS. I know the franchise has dropped off since the beginning, but I was still excited to see Bruce Willis’ John McClaine back in action…which is why I was incredibly heartbroken at how bad this one was.

First of all, it’s set in Russia. Um, no. McClaine is a cowboy at heart. He’s very much an American hero. I guess part of the reasoning was to get in a bunch of fish out of water jokes, but it just didn’t work. Next, the action was subpar (with the possible exception of the helicopter bit towards the end). By the time we hit the halfway point, all we’ve seen is one long an drawn out car chase. I get that Willis/McClaine is aging, but you don’t cheat the action to compensate. And finally, there was no fun banter and one liners. Or at least, nothing on the level of previous films. Hell, at least Live Free or Die Hard was incredibly funny between McClaine’s techno-ignorance and Justin Long being Justin Long. The writing on this one, for that aspect in particular, just felt so phoned in.

I did like the idea of bringing in McClaine’s son and having them team up. Maybe they’re testing a possible franchise transfer. In principle, I’d be okay with it. But they’re gonna hafta do some serious thinking about where they’re going with it. I was so bored, I spent the whole time just waiting for this installment’s obligatory delivery of one of the best one liners ever, Yippi Ki Yay Mother \m/. I found it anticlimactic. Hell, I almost missed it because boredom drove me to eat my between movie cupcake during the film, and I was concentrating on eating up all the red velvet off the wrapper.

A Good Day to Die Hard – \m/ \n

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *