The Expendables 2

“Continuing the unintended week of adrenaline movies is The Expendables 2. I remember being so \m/ psyched for the first flick. For me, Jason Statham is reason enough to see an action movie, but then add in Stallone, Willis, Ahnold, Jet Li, and the rest of the merry band, and my feable little mind could hardly handle the excitement. But then the movie came and went, and I really dont remember anything about it. What was a great idea fell flat, relying too much on the idea’s greatness to carry the film and not trying hard enough to make it a worthy experience. Thankfully the sequel handled this situation much better.

Following the current trend of self aware films, this movie played up every possible joke about its stars. There were multiple “”I’ll be backs””, a Rambo reference, and even a yippie-kai-yay. And Chuck Norris even recited a Chuck Norris fact. Oh yeah, did I mention Chuck \m/ Norris is in this movie?

It occurred to me that I’ve never really seen a Chuck Norris film. He’s a very special person for my family because my Daddy was a dead ringer for him. We’d hear people whispering whenever we were out of town. Freshmen at the high school he taught at would run into the next classroom to ask if it was really him. A family friend spotted the real Chuck Norris, and his comment when telling his mother the story was that he looked just like my Daddy. It always amused me to walk into the living room and catch him watching Walker Texas Ranger. This was a _very_ common occurrence. I’d tease him to inquire why he was watching something he filmed. His usual response was along the lines of wanting to make sure they got it right. Not to go all hipster on you, but we were making Chuck Norris jokes before they were a thing. When I first encountered a list of Chuck Norris facts, sent to me by a friend that had met my Daddy, said friend and I literally fell on the floor laughing. Bear in mind I only use the word literally when I mean it. So yeah, big \m/ deal for me to see the man on the big screen.

The other VIP for me (because really, would you take that title away from Mr Texas Ranger?) was Jason Statham. And no, I’m not just playing favorites. Part of what makes him my favorite action star, by which I mean specifically for action as opposed to just being a fave in general, is that he’s one of the few of this generation that is legit trained for this stuff. The trend nowadays is to take a big name pretty boy, teach him some kung fu, and then he moves on with his life. Statham had several really \m/ bad ass fight scenes here, the likes of which we haven’t seen in a while. I’m talking Transporter level gritty and skilled fighting. No stunt double, no CGI, no holds barred. I also loved the bromance between him and Stallone. They bantered and bickered like bros aught. Chuckles were ellicited each time.

The movie was kinda short, but it was fast and full throttle. Things got blowed up. Bad guys got killed. Tough guys delivered one liners. What more could you possibly ask for?

The Expendables 2 – \m/ \m/ \m/ \m/

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